For men who serve and have served
You don't have to carry this alone.
If you are an active-duty service member, reservist, or veteran and you are thinking about suicide, reaching out is not weakness. It is the next right move. This page is plain, direct, and judgment-free.
In crisis right now
Dial 988, then press 1.
The Veterans Crisis Line is free, confidential, and open 24/7. Responders are trained to work with service members and veterans. You do not need to be enrolled in VA care.
If there is immediate danger
- Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.
- Put distance between you and any means of harm: firearms, pills, anything you could use.
- Stay with someone, or ask someone to stay with you until help arrives.
- Outside the U.S.? Use the Military Crisis Line options at veteranscrisisline.net.
Warning signs to take seriously
You might notice these in yourself, or in a buddy. One sign does not mean a crisis. A cluster, or a sudden change, means it is time to act.
What you say or think
- Talking about wanting to die or being a burden
- Feeling trapped, hopeless, or out of options
- Intense guilt, shame, or anger that will not ease
What you do
- Pulling away from family, friends, and unit
- Drinking or using more, or taking reckless risks
- Giving away gear, saying goodbyes, getting affairs in order
- Looking for or reaching for firearms or other means
Your next steps, in the next hour
You do not have to fix everything today. Just get through the next hour safely.
1
Make the space safer
Move firearms, pills, and other means out of reach. Ask a friend or family member to hold them for now.
2
Tell one person
A buddy, a spouse, a sibling, a chaplain. Say it simply: "I'm not okay and I need you with me tonight."
3
Call or text 988, press 1
You can stay on the line while you work out what comes next. You do not need the right words. "I'm struggling" is enough.
If you are worried about a buddy or a family member
You do not need to be a counselor. You need to be present. Asking about suicide does not plant the idea. It often brings relief.
- Ask directly: "Are you thinking about killing yourself?"
- Listen: let him talk without fixing or arguing.
- Keep him safe: help limit access to firearms and other means.
- Connect him: offer to sit with him while he calls 988, press 1.
- Follow up: check in tomorrow, and next week.
Two paths to care: VA and Vet Centers
You can use one or both. Neither requires you to be in crisis, and neither will judge you for waiting this long.
VA mental health care
Counseling, medication, same-day urgent mental health care, and suicide prevention coordinators at every VA medical center.
- Call your local VA medical center and ask for the Suicide Prevention Coordinator
- Ask for same-day mental health care
- Emergency mental health care is available even if you are not enrolled
Vet Centers
Small, community-based counseling offices staffed by many veterans. Confidential, informal, and separate from your VA medical record.
- Free individual, group, and family counseling for eligible veterans and service members
- Help with combat stress, trauma, and readjustment
- Call the Vet Center Call Center at 877-927-8387, any hour
Asking for help is a mission skill
You were trained to handle it yourself, push through, and not let the team down. That training kept you alive. It can also keep you silent.
- "I should be able to handle this." Pain is not a performance review. Needing support is not failing.
- "It will hurt my career or clearance." Seeking mental health care rarely affects clearances or careers. Untreated crisis is the bigger risk.
- "Others had it worse." Your pain counts. You do not have to rank it.
- "I do not want to be a burden." The people who care about you would rather hear it from you than lose you.
A simple safety plan, in four moves
A safety plan is a short written list you make when you are calm, and use when you are not. Write it on paper or in your phone. Share a copy with someone you trust.
1. Know your warning signs
Write down the thoughts, moods, or situations that tell you things are slipping.
2. Pick what steadies you
A walk, a workout, a shower, music, a drive with someone else. List three things that take the edge off.
3. Name your people
Two or three people you can call or text, with their numbers. Add 988, press 1, to the list.
4. Lock down your space
Decide now who will hold firearms or medications if things get dark. Distance buys time, and time saves lives.
Crisis resources
For when you need someone now. All are free and confidential.
- Veterans Crisis Line: dial 988, then press 1
- Text: 838255
- Online chat: VeteransCrisisLine.net/Chat
- Emergency: 911 or the nearest ER
- Vet Center Call Center: 877-927-8387
Non-crisis resources
For when you are not in crisis, but you know something has to change.
- Your VA medical center: ask to schedule a mental health appointment
- Vet Centers: walk-in or call for confidential counseling
- Military OneSource: free counseling for service members and families, 800-342-9647
- Chaplains and unit leaders: a confidential first conversation
- Peer support: other veterans who have been where you are
Conversation starters
The hardest part is the first sentence. Borrow one.
If you are the one struggling
"I haven't been right for a while, and I don't want to hide it anymore."
"I've had thoughts of ending it. I need you to stay with me while I call for help."
"Can you come with me to the Vet Center? I can't do the first visit alone."
If you are checking on someone
"You don't seem like yourself lately. I'm not going anywhere. What's going on?"
"Are you thinking about suicide? I'm asking because I care, and I can handle the answer."
"Thank you for telling me. Let's call 988, press 1, together right now."
Keep reading: related support for men
Suicide risk rarely shows up alone. These pages cover what often travels with it.
If you are in crisis, do not keep scrolling. Dial 988, then press 1. You matter, and help is ready.