Caregiver Burden: You Are Carrying a Lot, and You Do Not Have to Carry It Alone
A calm place for service members, reservists, veterans, and the family and friends who care for them. Take what helps. Leave the rest.
A note on safety and support
This page offers information and encouragement, not medical advice or a replacement for professional care. If you or someone you care for is in crisis or thinking about suicide, you can call or text 988 and press 1 for the Veterans Crisis Line at any hour. If there is immediate danger, call 911.
Understanding caregiver burden
What caregiver burden really means
Caregiver burden is the physical, emotional, and financial strain that can build up when you look after someone who is ill, injured, or struggling. It is not a sign that you love them any less. It is a sign that you have been giving a great deal for a long time.
Caregivers can be spouses, partners, parents, adult children, siblings, friends, or neighbors. Some are also service members or veterans themselves. All of them deserve care too.
Pressures military families often carry
Military life adds its own weight to caregiving. Naming it can make it feel a little lighter.
Frequent moves and distance
Relocations, deployments, and training schedules can cut families off from trusted friends, relatives, and providers.
Invisible injuries and stress
Living with someone managing PTSD, a traumatic brain injury, or chronic pain can mean constant, quiet vigilance at home.
Low-pressure steps
Small steps, at your pace
You do not need to fix everything this week. Pick one thing that feels possible today.
1. Name what you are feeling
Write down one or two words for how this week has felt. There is no right or wrong answer.
2. Protect ten quiet minutes
A short walk, a shower, or a cup of something warm counts. Rest is part of caregiving, not a break from it.
3. Tell one person the truth
Choose a friend, relative, chaplain, or counselor you trust and share how things really are.
4. Ask for one specific kind of help
A ride to an appointment, a meal, or an hour of company. Specific requests are easier for others to say yes to.
Support pathways for every kind of caregiver
Whether you care for a spouse, a parent, a child, or a friend, and whether you are serving, retired, or a veteran yourself, there is a place to start.
For you, the caregiver
Peer groups, respite options, counseling, and training that help you stay well while you support someone else.
For the person you support
Mental wellness resources and care options for service members, reservists, and veterans, at whatever stage they are in.
For the whole family
Children, teens, partners, and parents all feel the effects of caregiving. Support can be shared.
For anyone, in any role
Not sure where you fit? Start here. Shared support is open to women, men, and everyone in between.
VA and military resources
Help with VA and military resources
Navigating benefits can feel like another job. These programs exist to support caregivers and families, and you can ask for help at every step.
- VA Caregiver Support Program: education, peer support, and clinical guidance for caregivers of eligible veterans.
- Military OneSource: free, confidential counseling and family support for service members and their families.
- Vet Centers: readjustment counseling for veterans, service members, and their families.
- Local VA medical centers: a caregiver support coordinator can walk you through options near you.
Community and transition help
Community and transition help
Leaving active duty or changing roles at home is a big shift for the whole household. Connection with people who have been there can make it feel less lonely.
- Peer groups and community gatherings for families
- Transition guidance for service members, reservists, and veterans
- Help finding employment, housing, and education support
- Faith, volunteer, and neighborhood networks
Related family and mental-health resources
Keep exploring at your own pace. These pages and recommendations are here when you are ready.
Mental wellness resources
Articles and tools on stress, sleep, grief, and emotional health for everyone in the household.
Transition guidance
Practical help for moving from military to civilian life, for you and the people who share your home.
Books and recommended websites
A growing shelf of readings and trusted sites on caregiving, family life, and healing.
Resources for women and for men
Dedicated pages for women and for men, alongside shared support that is open to everyone.
If things feel like too much right now, reach out
Call or text 988, then press 1, to reach the Veterans Crisis Line. It is free, confidential, and open day and night to service members, veterans, and the people who love them.
You can also chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net or text 838255. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. Asking for help is a steady, strong choice.